The world believes that one should forgive others for what they have done. But seldom does one realise one’s own behavior causing the problem. None wants to see, understand, relate and accept one’s own errors, ego and nature that has caused such a turn of events. The same happens often other side of coin too. What happens then is a self ego appeasement concept of mentally forgiving others and feeling and continuing life. Is it forgiveness or even remotely accepting your role in the whole process, it is nothing just a play of ego of One being righteous and errors happening in other side only.
Mutually hurting concepts does never realise that both sides are hurt at multiple levels be it physical, mental or emotional. On all such levels it is the levels of conditions of ‘I’ or ‘Me’.
Most of the people in normal daily life are not really responsible for the condition one is holding. One have to own up to the errors that allowed the conditions to set in. Hatred, rudeness, inhuman behavior happens due to non acceptance of ones own fault and errors. There may be hundreds of past wounds, thousands of past errors, but why carry them. The more one carries the more the body and mind gets tired of waiting, holding and carrying on such a burden of wounds or scars of past that one unknowingly have been keeping fresh to give the unknown sadistic side of ego the pleasure or happiness in playing the victim game.It shouldn’t have happened. Circumstances happened, situations happened but then how can one think of blaming anyone for one’s own faults and errors. They were done by one over so many years that it never felt like an error or wrong thing. Because of I, the surrounding innocent, loving, kind and clean hearted people feel hurt every time, thus, a new cycle of victim game emerges among them.
One’s own idea and concept is always Ones own, one has no right to drag, force and keep harping about ‘I’ and ‘ME’ making others to feel forced to do something uncalled for. This will truly cause irreparable damage at personal, official relationship at professional,emotional, financial and social levels.
One has to be ready and strong to realise one’s own errors and flaws. This is a big responsible and accountable task it is for one realises the burden of them. Lot of modern day people forgive others mentally and continue life but that is only ego pleasing of self being done. Ego of being superior for you have forgiven others but does it mean others have forgotten what happened with them.
How can one not be held responsible for all the deeds one has done in the name of personal, emotional, mental and spiritual freedom. Seldom or normally one is never able to realise the damage being done but even after years one doesn’t realise it, thus, beliving that one is not guilty. But the pain, wounds and scars remain forever etched once laid down.
It is far worse for those who love the one and hold on to one even with all pain and suffering. One has truly be indebted to all such people and should be bold enough to seek forgiveness in person. Possibly you may gain forgiveness and quite possibly the pain of the wounds are such that you may not gain forgiveness. But this seeking of forgiveness is not for gaining forgiveness alone but also to fully realise what has gone through and resolving or repenting for them.
A big learning is here of knowing and accepting you in you and also realising the one in he is also same like you.
Seek forgiveness for you may never realise how many precious lives got wasted due to you. Promises made to them have fallen away and the spirits just are there waiting. This shouldn’t happen with people still around. So seek forgiveness for all talks, errors and mistakes that have hurt anyone or any family member in any sort of manner knowingly or unknowingly. This is needed for you to evolve and gain the humbleness and humaneness which we normally lose connection so easily.
– Maitreya Rudrabhayananda